This is for a friend, Dan.
Hope and Reality - I am often awed and bemused between these two words. Between its ultimate unity and meaning and the co-relation of the words, it involves a maze of confusing pathways. Very often, there are questions that challenge our faith. Does having hope necessarily bring about purpose in real life? Will it make acceptance any easier for that so-called the easy life? Is hope a driving force for a greater accomplishment?
I have always thought that life should be meaningful. Life is so much easier when we stop resisting it. True, it is not exactly to be for every moment every day but to get on the path of a meaningful life, we just need to live our life with intentions. We need to embrace and honour what shows up. Life itself, with all what it carries of good and bad, bitter and sweet is worth living for. Every moment, there is always something to experience, to learn and to give.
Mostly, we live to find answers to refine our ideas about God, about heaven, about love, about the world in which we find ourselves, about our own hidden ambitions, and other profound matters. There are myriads of thought processes in a single minute. The countless number of questions can seem a struggle, a battle and a tough road until we discover the peace resulting from its total acceptance. Often, we are asked to open our hearts, to use the mind to search for meaning and purpose in this world we are in and to seek self awareness.
At the end of the day, we may ask what is it all for? One of the hardest thing we have to do is to find acceptance. Until we are able to accept a person, a situation, a place or a thing as being exactly the way it is supposed to be that we, truly, will find serenity. We yearn and actively strive to be happy and to live a fulfilled life. Yet, we often find it hard to accept that nothing, absolutely nothing happens in our life is by mistake. When we sooner realize every life experience has a purpose - that it has to happen for a reason, even if it is beyond our knowing, helps pave the way to peaceful acceptance. We arrive at some form of purpose.
It is said that when we do nothing, we feel overwhelmed and powerless. But, when we get involved, we feel the sense of hope and accomplishment. Yes, once we choose to hope for something, anything is possible. With hope, the unverse always win so long there is love.
Everything has it's time. We just have to learn the rules of the universe first. Love comes to those who still believe in hope even though they have been disappointed, to those who still believe even though they have been betrayed, to those who still love even though they have been hurt before.
Everyday, we wake up to look forward to something, to wish for something, all in confidence in the possibility of its fulfilment. This optimistic feeling of hopefulness hinges everything to what life is all about. To which, life should prevail. Whatever we think, or say or do, on purpose stay with us; it may be good or bad.
Hope can be, as in the proverb, a good breakfast but can turn out to be a bad supper. When hope is lost, nothing remains. Nonetheless, there must be a higher purpose than this, for a real reason to our existence. A good breakfast is when we create the reality from beginning to the end, with faith that it provides nourishment and an integration for the soul and mind. This includes the single unit coherent to purpose and for a reality to be what it is that we had hoped for. We will find that a life of love and usefulness gives us a deep sense of purpose that result in further fulfilment.
It is always an easy thing to say, 'Let's hope for ...' but why do it, sometimes, got to end with a bad reality? How can we reconcile such occurence with our everyday experience in which we live? In our human relationships, we know how wonderful to hope for our love for someone is freely returned - not because they have to love us but because they want to love us.
Bad things happen. We just hope that they don't. To love someone and leaving him the freedom to respond, or not, is a risk and can be a potentially painful reality. This is why hope and reality need to have an image and likeness in the same purpose - all in good faith.
To begin the journey toward peaceful reality, try letting go of analyzing or attempting to 'figure out' the 'why's' of the situation. We should continue to hope and cannot force for all realities to accord to our life's terms. Our lesson in life usually begins with a door closing to let us enter into an uncomfortable period. This is the hard period.
Reality may, at times, confuse our senses. What if reality is not quite so real? Worse, what is real can be a different matter than the actual circumstances we perceive. Perhaps, reality is just a concept because we want to know whether we should take life seriously.
The only reason we often ask ourselves, "Is this all real?" is because we want to know. We want to be kind to ourselves to build the foundation of a life well-lived and build bridges to a meditated future. It is the natural thing as we are always so afraid to get disappointed, to be hurt. Endeavoring to accept everything in our life as it is now, does not mean we ignore our hope for a future factual and symbolic reality.
Dan, I believe only when you are able to identify your needs that you will be able to take delight in your hope for happiness. In your hope to have a freely returned relationship. You partner, though not perfect too, is somewhat living in his reality. Acceptance is the beginning, the starting point for creating a different outcome. Acceptance of what is will allow you to take responsibility for your circumstances.
My question to you is, has everything that you hoped for, you believed to be true, created the reality? You are indeed wise to take your time now to evaluate what you believe and to make some changes. I can only hope that, every night before going to sleep, call to mind all the things in your life which bring a feeling that is true to your heart. When you still love your partner, accept it. Then move to other blessings in your life. Allow yourself to bring a feeling of gratitude.
Shorten the misery - this feeling of helplessness or hopelessness will not shift your energy into feeling comfort and peace when you keep fighting against your heart's desire.
Think about what you want to think, feel, have and be, Dan. It is a hope for greater things, for your hope to match the reality. I can only pray for the divine spark to knock on the door of your heart, for your hope to discover the real fulfillment. Real life is a life filled with fulfillment, acceptance and purpose. I am sure you can find it in your relationship with your partner but only when you can find it within yourself first. You cannot give away what you don't hold in the first place.
Hehe, it is not, as though, that your partner has found someone new. And that, my dear friend, is a totally different thing. Totally a different pain, a different hurt.
I offer Reiki Distant Healing