Monday, August 31, 2009


I always yearn for a quality conversational topic, shared amongst friends, to raise beyond any given boundary to enrich for a higher state of spiritual consciousness.  To come to terms with my spiritual awakening for wisdom.  For its deeper understanding about life and the great insights into the meaning for spiritual enlightenment.  For mysticism and science to live side by side together spiritually.  Waking up the soul purpose and seeking an enriched life and the quest for self actualization. 

I long an earnest and heartfelt grasp of knowledge to further improve myself.  For positive approaches to feed nourishment in my thoughts and actions, constantly reminding myself for the need to self reflect.  To accept failures where I had previously made.  To swallow my pride and unmasked every of my vulnerabilities each day.  To face the world and keep my hopes high each moment.  To alter into a state of higher consciousness.  For the ultimate to reach out to the joy in my heart and peace in my mind.

Two weeks ago, I had a very good conversation with a friend.  Two individuals sharing the frailties of everyday lives.  Each, within  the eternity of the souls with all certain issues surrounding life and death, awakened our spirits.  Swallowing our pride and selling our souls. 

It was a good meeting.  Two friends, sharing self intoxicated offense to moral sensibilities and retreated into inglorious character defeat, unfolded a shameful display of cowardice towards a better understanding of the Self.  Of how our minds wretch to keep quiet, and not let others know and not even to our closest friends, when we are in dire need of help. 

We hold onto our pride that we have inside, and we think, we don't need help.  Our pride keeps us from asking for help, to stop and think for a moment that it is alright to be needy.  We, too often, tend to think that we always have to be strong, to not show that we are weak, and to not let others think less of us.

It was a night of revelation.  No longer important was the taste of our drinks nor the desserts we had earlier ordered.  Nor the initial uncomfortability about the place we were in.  Perhaps, when two souls meet in the nakedness of ego - in self consciousness of its presence, no matter how much comfort we take in the concept of ourselves, the death of the ego-self is the death of the concept of self.  To not know who we are is the shattering of the entire universe.  We were driven into the alley of a higher self; the integral part of the whole creation in mind.

The duality within us, within the mind-body-spirit modality which constitutes our being, encapsulates our entire experience of ourselves and our lives.  Each and every one of us have two distinct aspects within.  These aspects are our constant companions on our life's journey and, no matter how hard we try, we cannot escape them.  Together, they make up our consciousness and our very experience of our Self and our life.

The first aspect represents our appearance and the face we wear in this world.  From the moment we are born, we are given a name, race, gender and social status.  It's called the ego.  It represents us to others and to the world at large.  It is a social need.  It is a necessary defence mechanism, for the mind, that looks at the world and thinks, "I".  "I" is a mask that we wear that is necessary for our spirit to be able to live in this life.  "I" is an accumulated phenomenon, a social by-product of living with others. 

The "I" distinguishes the ability to simply recognizes 'good' or 'bad', 'fat' or thin', 'attractive' or 'unattractive', 'rich' or 'poor', 'smart' or 'stupid'.  In its non-existence, which is far more difficult than merely abdicating arrogance, selfishness or other 'egotistic' tendencies, "I" quickly learn to judge others, mostly, on erroneous bases.  It becomes the only language of thought adopted by the "I" that have ever spoken.

The second aspect is "I Am"; the spirit or our higher self.  It is that part of us that is invisible.  That quietly lives in the inner space deep inside our consciousness.  "I Am" is free spirit and has always been.

Both "I" and "I Am" are the two sides of the same us.  Like two faces of the same coin, they are inextricably connected to each other.  Both are part of the life force, the one primarily concerned with where we are.  While the other is primarily concerned with where we came from and where we are ultimately going back to.

Although "I Am" and "I" are so closely related, they have vastly different demands on both our conscious and unconscious attention.  "I" prioritizes with maintaining it's importance in the world.  It always wants to be right and is convinced of the fact that it is separate from everyone else.  It always strives to have more, to be better and to dominate.  It compares to others, unconsciously, to see how it stacks up outside of itself.

"I Am" seeks to be at peace and being right, and conquering others, is of no concern.  "I Am" has no need for more, the quantitative quality, because it knows that life value comes from within itself and not from what it gains.  Or from what it wins.  Or what it collects and accumulates.

Often, our potential to live life in the image of "I Am" is fully woven into the fabric of "I".  Anything that affects "I Am" affects "I" and everything else.  Anything that affects everything else affects us.  Self reflection is crucial in minimizing the strained woven fabric of creation.  "I" is a stand alone entity and thus sees everything in those terms.  It can only remember the past and guess about the future.  "I Am" can see the past, present and future all at once.

Much of our own inner conflicts arise from a conflict between these two aspects of ourselves.  It presents us with two vastly different and conflicting sets of demands.  Living a more spiritual life, with a greater sense of inner peace and personal fulfillment, is primarily about placing greater emphasis on the higher self and on giving the "I Am" a greater prominence in our life.  It is not a process of slaying the "I" but about learning to subdue its demands in favour of "I Am" to be at peace.

The real question is who we are allowing to run things in our life?  Is it "I Am" or is it "I"?  How do we differentiate between these two aspects in all our actions?  We should constantly not be driven by wanting to have more, by being better than or by being right and dominating.  Echkart Tolle, in his book "The Power of Now" writes "if they do not free themselves from their mind in time, they will be destroyed by it."

Pay attention to our thoughts.  When they are fear motivated, it is "I" at work.  When they are greedy, it is "I".  When they are status motivated, it is "I".  When they are territorial, it is "I".  But when they are fearless, expansive, generous, compassionate, inclusive and harmonious, they are "I Am".

The decisions where "I Am" will steer us towards are always going to lead us in the direction of more love, greater harmony, authentic ease and true joy.  Though the "I" promises these desirable things too, it simply cannot deliver them.  It is not equipped to.

It is important to recognize that "I" is the puppet of reptilian brain that is in charge of physical survival.  It does not have a long view but rather to protect the physical body at the moment of threat.  "I" is short sighted, territorial, greedy, fearful and status motivated.  It masquerades well as being able to offer us all that "I Am" does.

"I Am" is not deceived by appearances and, often, offers us the deep fulfillment that only aligned with soul purpose.  We should drive our life by having a sense of inner peace.  By being compassionate and reaching out to others and giving.  By living in harmony with the flow of goodness of the universe.

That night, my friend and I felt that we were awakened by the divine force behind life.  That we are constantly endowed with the innate ability to create in our lives everything that we desire.  Success, inner peace, love, joy and bliss are all available only when we allow ourselves to look inside.  When we acknowledge "I" and give empowerment to "I Am" to free us from life mediocrity.  Finding the missing link in life is to know that "I" exists for a reason; a condition to look outside ourselves for guidance and even for wisdom.

Looking deep within "I" is the key to unlock the dimension of life for a sense of purpose.  For the discovery of our own spirituality and for that unique and special purpose as a human being.  For that fuel that will drive our life to the deep inner sense.  That night was different that makes all the difference.

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    About Me

    I am a certified Master in Traditional USUI REIKI and KARUNA REIKI. I am also a certified practitioner in MAGNIFIED HEALING and INNER DANCE.

    I have been teaching and conducting spirituality, healing and energy works (including Breathing Techniques, Meditation and Spinal Qiqong) for more than two decades.

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